Let’s go off-meds with Mike Cernovich!

I haven’t covered what’s going on in Mike Cernovich’s alt-reality for quite a while. This is partly because he is, like arsenic, best consumed in small doses, and partly also because, credit where credit’s due, he did turn out to be completely right about the American Presidential election. However, since that involves, for practical purposes, two parties, anyone has a fifty per cent chance of getting that right (and being American’s an advantage too), so I’m not getting impressed with his political punditry yet. If he’d correctly predicted the outcome of the Dutch election this week, I’d probably be asking him for racing tips and stock predictions right now.

Also, once his mission to get Trump elected was accomplished, his blog did seem to ease off a little on its signature epic bombast and outrageous inaccuracy. But, they do say you can’t keep a good man down, and here’s a link to one of his more recent posts.

“Everyone agrees that Trump is the most powerful man in world history.”

But of course. Alexander the Great, Augustus Caesar, Genghis Khan, Philip II of Spain, Hitler, Stalin, all the forty-odd US Presidents before Trump, many of whom were more or less as powerful as he is – who the hell were all those guys compared to the Donald? Featherweights, says I.

“If you doubt this assertion, try reading a Twitter account omitting discussions of his latest doings.”

“You’ll probably find it doesn’t belong to one of the tediously opinionated airheads who dominate that social media platform, and hence is refreshingly readable! Or at least includes funny photos of cats. Also, Twitter is really important – because I’m all over it, of course!”

“People are gaining weight because of Trump. Jobs are being created.”

I will admit to having missed the speech in which the President declared “You know what the problem with America is? We’re all too damn skinny! What I want you people to do, like, right away, is get out there and start eating massive roast dinners three times a day!” A pity, really, but I’m going to have to suggest that this claim might just be total  bullshit.

The “jobs created” bit I assume refers to the mini-Stock Market boom since Trump’s election. However, once you’ve factored out the part of this that’s due to general economic conditions unconnected with anything he says he’ll do, taken into account the lag between “company becoming more valuable” and “company hiring more staff” and considered that a company’s share price increasing does not magically provide it with more real money with which to hire, I think you’d have a real problem proving Trump has created jobs. And Cernovich doesn’t even try proving it.

“These developments make complete sense to any student of philosophy.”

Well, they are bullshit, and the philosopher Harry G. Frankfurt did write a book On Bullshit, so they probably make complete sense to him…

“In Reality, Trump has far less power than we imagine…Symbolism is why Trump has power over the world…We do not live in Reality. We live in a socially constructed reality.”

This is all true, but there’s nothing unique to Trump in that. American Presidents, even at the height of the post-war American imperial age, have never been quite as powerful as they look. The US Constitution was deliberately written to limit the Presidency.

And it’s not that shocking or new an idea that reality is to some extent what we agree it is. However, what Cernovich is going to, rather sneakily, go on to do is to use this idea to justify his (and Trump’s) favoured tactic of pumping out as much bullshit as possible in the hope that it confuses everyone so much they stop asking questions. Hey, we live in a socially constructed reality, this isn’t outrageous behaviour at all!

“It’s endlessly amusing watching English majors struggle with the rise of Trump or even the rise of me.”

“Me! Me! Me! I mean, just in case you forgot who the really important person here is.”

“How can “big gorillas” win, they exclaim in between bites of cream cheese frosted cup cakes.”

“Lol@ those people with their fancy English degrees and their girly cup cakes!” This is Cernovich blatantly pandering to the section of his fanbase that consists of nerdy basement dwellers with terrible jobs, but by God they got engineering degrees, and that makes them superior to nerdy basement dwellers with bad jobs who got English degrees. The phrase “two bald men fighting over a comb” springs to mind.

Also notice that oh so subtle plug for the whole idiotic “Gorilla Mindset” thing. Seriously, who talks like that in real life?

“While discussions of alpha and beta grow tiresome, status is all around us.”

I’ll just pause to remind everyone that before Mikey C turned Danger and Play into rahrahgotrump.net, it promoted his ideas about being a success in life for men, and it still contains plenty of just such discussions.

Anyway, he goes on to talk about how the “fake news” media, as he thinks of them, still have status as compared to outlets like his website, but not for much longer, because he and others in social media have shown how they can set the agenda, set the news cycle and force them to talk about what he wants, so removing their status. This is what I mean about weaselling in a justification for bullshit artistry under the heading of ” it’s a socially constructed reality.”

Unsurprisingly, he includes a ton of self-congratulation about his success in persuading some of the media to talk about Hillary Clinton’s alleged health problems (in a just world, Cernovich would now look like an idiot if she doesn’t die for another 20 years, but no doubt either he or his claims on this subject will be long forgotten by the time that event arrives). Oh, and his eleventy billion subscribers on Twitter or whatever it is.

“Have you noticed that my writing rarely elaborates its concepts in detail? That’s a sign of social status.”

“My English teacher used to say it was a sign of bad writing and laziness, but who’s laughing now, Cupcake Boy!”

“Status is the power to decline explaining yourself.”

“If you are a shameless asshole, that is. I stand as one with the shameless assholes of this world!”

“It takes a deep education to write sharply.”

But any idiot can post things on the Internet. (Just read the rest of my blog).



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