Blow Hard II: Blow Harder (Yep, Mike Cernovich again)

Welcome to another post on Let’s All Make Fun of Mike Cernovich, a blog recording the tragic tale of a internet nobody’s weird obsession with a minor American conservative loudmouth. Can meltdown be far away for either? This time, the theme for the Mikester is his current favourite – the greatness of his demon overlord, Donald Trump. Link.

“What is it like waking up every day looking for a fight?”

(Well, kind of tiring I suppose, but…)

“That’s a question most people can’t relate to, as people are naturally conflict averse…We have lost our connection with the way of the warrior.”

(OK, I’m now beginning to suspect Mike Cernovich lives in an anime of the more combat-oriented kind.)

“Trump has the fighting spirit. Few understand or can recognize this fighting spirit.”

(Yup; he lives in Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann. ROW ROW FIGHT THE POWAH!)

“Consider the following thought experiment – I want you to enter a 17 person contest. You must compete against all 17 of these people. You must also fight against the people judging the contest as well as the people holding the contest. Every expert would tell you this is insanity.”

(He means the Republican primaries, of course. But all American primary elections involve this, for every candidate involved, so what makes very wealthy and already-famous guy Donald Trump such a hero for doing it?)

“He took on Low energy Jeb Bush, Little Marco Rubio, Lyin’ Ted and Crooked Hillary Clinton.”

(“He fought the champ in Pittsburgh and he slashed him to the ground/He took on Tiny Tartanella and it only went one round!”)

“He refused to attend a debate due to a feud with news anchor Megyn Kelly. When the GOP tried forcing Trump into a later debate, he decided not to show up…”

(Wow, all that not going to things really shows energy and fighting spirit! Here’s a thought experiment: Try not turning up to work tomorrow, then phone your boss and explain that you’re being a true warrior today by staying in bed. Guaranteed promotion!)

“Lots of words about assorted media folk who sued Trump over his tweets, cried over his tweets or generally don’t like what the Mikester actually admits are “mean tweets.” TRUMP’S VERY TWEETS ARE MANLY!”

(As so often, Cernovich confuses “manliness” and “being pointlessly rude to people.” It’s not difficult to make celebrity US journalists look like big pampered babies with inflated but fragile egos, because a lot of them are. But why is the wannabe Leader of the Free World pillocking around insulting relatively unimportant people on Twitter at all?)

“Trump has exposed the media as a bunch of pathetic bullies.”

(ROW ROW FIGHT THE POWAH! Oh, yeah, of course, I forgot, because despite being a billionaire and star of reality TV, Trump has to present himself as some kind of “outsider” and a cheap way to do that is by being rude to famous news presenters, as opposed to, say, the CEOs of Goldman Sachs or Coca Cola.)

“Now you understand Trump’s obsession with energy. Trump lives to fight and to fighters need energy (sic).”

(“…and that’s why Donald Trump agrees that a Mars a day helps you work, rest and play! Oh, wait, I forgot, I never plug products on my website. Unless they’re my rubbish books, of course.”)

“I am also obsessed with energy, and have written articles on how to increase it.”

(PLUG THAT SUCKER, BABY; PLUG IT!)

“How do we win? We keep fighting. I take the fight to these media cucks and frauds day on Twitter (sic), and they all fear me.”

 Also, the Mikester is terrible at checking his own posts for grammatical or spelling errors, and when he’s spreading opinions like this, yes, I do judge him for that.)

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